A Very Undead Christmas

Yesterday, I posted a little zombie haiku by Christopher Moore.  For those that are unfamiliar with Christopher Moore, allow me to educate you:  His books are probably the funniest that you’ll ever read.  I’m talking, snorting laughter, milk-coming-out-of-your-nose funny.  It’s not just his plots, which are hilarious, but the prose itself — the stuff written between plot points — that’ll have you in hysterics.

stupidest-angelHis subjects tend to lean towards the fantastic: monsters, vampires, Death (the being), etc.  Yet he always seemsto be able to inject a lot of heart into the stories.  Not a lot of writers can manage to be ridiculously funny, and at the same time make you care about the Undead (see: Bloodsucking Fiends: A Love Story and You Suck).

So it’s no surprise that Christopher Moore has written what it probably the greatest Christmas novel of all time: The Stupidest Angel: A Heartwarming Tale of Christmas Terror.  Here’s the official synopsis:

Christmas crept into Pine Cove like a creeping Christmas thing: dragging garland, ribbon, and sleigh bells, oozing eggnog, reeking of pine, and threatening festive doom like a cold sore under the mistletoe.

‘Twas the night (okay, more like the week) before Christmas, and all through the tiny community of Pine Cove, California, people are busy buying, wrapping, packing, and generally getting into the holiday spirit.

But not everybody is feeling the joy. Little Joshua Barker is in desperate need of a holiday miracle. No, he’s not on his deathbed; no, his dog hasn’t run away from home. But Josh is sure that he saw Santa take a shovel to the head, and now the seven-year-old has only one prayer: Please, Santa, come back from the dead.

But hold on There’s an angel waiting in the wings. (Wings, get it?) It’s none other than the Archangel Raziel come to Earth seeking a small child with a wish that needs granting. Unfortunately, our angel’s not sporting the brightest halo in the bunch, and before you can say “Kris Kringle,” he’s botched his sacred mission and sent the residents of Pine Cove headlong into Christmas chaos, culminating in the most hilarious and horrifying holiday party the town has ever seen.

Move over, Charles Dickens — it’s Christopher Moore time.

So what is this book recommendation doing on a zombie blog?  Well, you’re just going to have to trust me and read the book, and you’ll find that out for yourself (I’d hate to spoil anything here).  I’ve read this book every Christmas since its publication in 2004, and I’m about to start it again today.  It’s a Christmas book for people who don’t like Christmas books — hell, for people who don’t like Christmas.

You could go buy it on Amazon.com right now, or you could spend an extra five bucks and buy it from Books Inc, where you can get it signed by Mr. Moore himself.  Either way: buy it, read it, love it.

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